Indigo and One-on-One

Connecting with our Blossoms is a lifelong pursuit of mine.  We've always held that mama or daddy dates are really important.  I'm realizing now that those times, in addition to the concrete of regular family time, were paramount for a foundation of trust and connection that is necessary in the latter teen years and into the young adult years.

Young adults have real adult thoughts and struggles and situations and feelings that they really don't want to share with everyone.  This makes sense to me.

We may be a big, beautiful, bountiful Blossom Bunch but it's really, really important to carve out the one-on-one time to talk about anything, everything, nothing, and all the things.

Maybe it's coffee, 

maybe it's a car ride,

maybe it's a Walmart run,

but it's an opportunity for one-on-one connection that says, 

"I'm here, walking alongside you today."

Dominique

I thought everyone could use a little glimpse of billiant indigo color today.  These irises, called "Flags" by old-timers, were a very late autumn surprise last year.  

Three Things I Can Do to Bless Him Today

I was brewin' a thought process the other day and I realized that I haven't done a post about thrifty things you can do for your husband in a long, long time.  It's a really good thing for me to circle back to because it's so easy to fall into the trap that investing in our marriage means spending a good chunk of change.

There is SO MUCH I can do that costs me only grit and time.

#1 ~ Clean up the yard.  

The Rugged Mountain Man pulls up our driveway and right away, sees what needs to be done, just as I sometimes let out a long sigh of frustration when I return home from an afternoon of errands to disorder and disarray.  Today, while I chatted on the phone with my sister, I luxuriated in the sunshine and 44 degree weather while simultaneously picking up old peanut butter jars, yogurt containers, random trash that blows through here, and some larger sticks.  There are frisbees, dog toys, and miscellaneous homestead tools to be put away too.  Maybe he'll notice; maybe he won't.  Either way, it'll lighten his mental load.

#2 ~ Sit by him.

The older we get, the more spread thin, and the faster the schedules become, I realize that we can't take physical proximity for granted.  It doesn't automatically happen like it did while we were dating.  There's something to be said for sitting together, leaning against one another, and remembering that those moments are special... even if you're just working on the grocery order while you're both watching the Olympics.  

Physical proximity seems to naturally lead to more affection.  It's like it wakes us up out of the blinding, grinding stupor of everyday life.  It leads to more casual shoulder touches, smiles, and flirty casual moments too.

Start out the evening with a gentle, "Will you sit by me for a bit?"  

#3 ~ De-escalate, especially in the evenings.

This is a skill that doesn't come naturally to me at 8:00 pm.  The Rugged Mountain Man does not always get to see me in my freshest Mary Poppins mom moments; instead, he often sees the end of the day when it takes all I've got to help the Younger Blossoms resolve some bickering.  Out of frustration, I give in, amp up the frustrations, and worsen the situation.  

The right thing to do, of course, is a calm answer and patient instruction or firm consequences... not my personal venting.  

It's interesting that the right thing to do, per the Word, is also a blessing to my husband.  I know need to work on this, but it is one thing I can do to bless him this week.

Preserving and building a good marriage doesn't follow a formula that guarantees the desired results, friend, but this is what I can do on my end to be a blessing, to act out what the Lord is working in my heart.  

Five Ways to Bless Your Husband

Five More Ways to Bless Your Husband

Five Thrifty Ways to Invest in Your Marriage

Fire More Thrifty Ways to Bless Your Husband

More thoughts on investing in each other under the Marriage label.

Pics are from one of our nicer dates, but remember that the inexpensive ones are just as important (and usually more frequent!)

Productive Rest

Last weekend was a whirlwind, but we made it through to the other side.  If you remember, I was blogging from a coffee shop on the front side of a majorly over-scheduled weekend.

God has always been faithful to speak to my heart when I'm in the throes of parenting, to fill my cup and feed my spirit when I've had babies in my lap or young ones running around my chair.  Nowadays the "distractions" are more like thinking through logistics, answering a pressing question, or working on something that I didn't realize would be on my agenda today.  I'm faithful to spend time with the Lord in the morning every day, even when those things press in and try to derail me.  However, there is something about getting away, just me, to listen and read and journal and pray.  

The birthday party was a smashing success, with this "hat bar" at the top of the list for activities I've ever done with the Blossoms and their friends.

How cutesy are these personalized trucker hats?!!!

Blossom3 was thrilled with all the fun at her Sweet 16 and it made my mama heart so happy.  Their gratitude means a lot to me, but if they forget, I do what I do to serve the Master.

Shout out to the other 3/4 of the Blossoms who managed the party prep on their own while I carted Blossom3 and her friend and fellow State Project Ambassador to a day camp an hour away.  The party would not have been possible without our Blossom Bunch.  I was so thankful for their hard work and willingness to make her party nice.  I was impressed at how many things they remembered and accomplished that weren't on my to do list.  They were excellent hostesses as we came sliding into the driveway with twenty minutes til folks were set to arrive.

After staying up wayyyyyyy too late, Blossom3 and Blossom4 headed out the next morning for Gatlinburg, TN.

They relished the sunshine and warmer temps as I deeply embraced my homestead mama persona and fed animals on days that were -10*.  Honestly, as brutal as that was, I'm just grateful they had this opportunity to see some new sights and relive some of my childhood memories.

They did several hikes and enjoyed good quality time and several inside jokes with Grandma and Grandpa.

Meanwhile, after tackling all the housework and random projects that have been bothering me, I retreated to a local coffee shop in a greenhouse.  This is GENIUS in winter time.  

The sound of the running water,

the green of the plants around me,

the colors of the blossoms,

the warmth of the magnified sunshine,

the time with an old friend,

and a dirty chai.

Later in the week, I headed into town to find some books for a grad school project Blossom1 is doing.  Being that she's teaching all day in school, it makes it difficult to get to an actual library to get materials.  I was glad to be able to serve her in this way.  I texted her a pic of all I borrowed for her with the caption, "Never doubt that I love you."  Then, I decided that a better caption would have been, "Love is books."  

Then, I treated myself to a trip to the thrift store.

Blossom3 and Blossom4 returned home with this thank you mug for me and I am thrilled.  I think I'll go put the kettle on again.  It was a pleasant mix of productive rest this week.  I'm grateful that my little birds are safe in the nest again.

Dominique

Your Why, A Victory, and What's Brewing This Week

4-H has afforded the Blossoms many opportunites akin to the idea that, "The sky's the limit."  I love that this program helps them think like this.

Last weekend, Blossom2 was inducted onto State Council.  It's a bit of a pinnacle experience in your 4-H journey. The green blazer ceremony that kicked off the upcoming year's journey was enjoyable and inspiring and I needed that as a 4-H leader who has a lot more than just that volunteer side hustle on my plate.

When nearing burnout, keep your WHY front and center.

There was lots of joy and hugs and happy tears coming off the stage. 

On a practical note, I am so glad that Grandma was available to do professional blazer tailoring!

(clearly there is lots of journalling going on during quiet time)

The rest of the week has been preparing for the Younger Blossoms' trip to Tennessee, a birthday party, and Blossom3's 4-H State Project Ambassador event this weekend.  She's assisting with an expressive arts day camp and I'm excited to hear how it went.  I'm blogging from a little coffee shop this week and I'll be picking her up in a little while.

Blossom3 and Blossom4 decided we need more protein rich breakfast recipes.  It's been fun trying them out.  We all agreed that the protein cinnamon roll crepes are a favorite!  We even omitted the sweeteners so we could have some savory crepes for lunch and found those to be a delicious as well.

I love one on one interaction with the Blossoms, especially after a long day of directing and supervising and facilitating. I find I often need to consciously step back, reorient, and purpose to enjoy them.  

Mancala and Sudoku have been fun ways for me to do that lately.  Favorite plaid blankets and wool socks are a bonus too!

Blossom2 and I met up at a favorite coffee shop and did some thorough planning, organization, and brain-dumping about Blossom1's upcoming bridal shower.  It's super fun to plan events with carbon copies of yourself.  I love being on the same team as my girls!  She and I were also impressed with the Ube selections.  Paired with top-knotch pastries, we were happy to combine work with pleasure.  The chatting and chilling together made my mama heart so happy.

Given the coffee references, is it surprising that Blossom1 chose "Love is Brewing" as the theme for her bridal shower?  I'm here for it.  Literally.

Other bright spots this week were Blossom1's students googling her and figuring out about her fair queen days.  

"Miss ____, the crown pic of you is fire, bro!"

"BRUH, that is so TUFF."

"THE AURA, Miss _____!"

Amidst the hard work, the bright spots shine brighter when I hone in and revel in them.

Dominique

Frigid and Beautiful?

Did I mention we're having subzero temps here in the Hollow lately?  And that's after the 12-15 inches of snow that fell from the heavens on Sunday.

I thought the sleigh mug was appropriate for the weather, because choosing your mug in the morning is "choosing your vibe."  It's a small thing but savoring the small things truly helps me savor real, everyday life.

Who knows what the Blossoms were ogling here, but there were all sorts of cutesy comments.  I love this.

(That's Blossom4's signature slime being stretched there.  I'm currently wondering if she will be an entrepreneur that builds a business around this. In the meantime, I won't tell you how many random containers of slime are all over our house.)

What a perk of homeschooling!  Blossom3 and Blossom4 were in between subjects.  It's a snack and a furry snuggle time sort of break.  

I don't have to understand how it works to know it helps to build healthy humans.

Blossom3 passed her learner's permit test!  Afterward, she sipped her celebratory Dunkin' frozen matcha and we took a few minutes to chat about anything and everything.  It was such a busy day that day, but all day long, we came back to relishing the victory of surpassing that milestone.

Celebrate the milestones.

With words.

With a matcha.

With a smile.

With a hug.

A dear friend from our church family passed away last week and we organized the funeral meal.  I got a kick out of our three instant pots all lined up, cranking out delicious homemade refried beans.  

There was something so beautiful about being together all day, working toward the same goal, problem-solving, and remembering Melvin.  Remembering how he was always serving in the background and loving people.  

Involving our children is something near and dear to my heart.  

This is how they learn to serve.  

This is how they learn to spearhead and conquer events like this.  

This is how they learn to show love. 

I once heard a comedian say something like, 

"Drugs were a big part of my upbringing.  

I got drug to church.  I got drug everywhere."

I can attest to this, and I hope you can hear my humor when you read this.

I got drug along to serve.  

I got drug into raking leaves all day at a camp.  

I got drug to outreach events to man carnival games and serve food.

I got drug into baking hundreds of cookies for campers.  

I got drug into washing tons of dishes.

I got drug along to clean the church.  

I got drug along to serve right along with Mom in whatever she was currently doing,

and guess what, it was good for me.  

I can now (and many times, then too) attest to the joy, fellowship, and beauty of serving together.

Dominique