Tuesday, May 23, 2017

Who Are You and What Have You Done with My Daughter?

Your previously sweet little pixie daughter, suddenly is acting like a nasty empress.

Your normally laid back and unflappable daughter has a short fuse and total lack of patience.  

Your funny and charming daughter is acting like explosive anger is perfectly acceptable.  

Your all-conquering daughter thinks what she's doing is never good enough for anyone anymore.


Where is this coming from?

Why are they acting like this?

Is this from me?

What am I doing wrong?

Why do I get so alarmed when a new "thing" begins?  Maybe the thing is a new habit.  Maybe you could call it a phase.  I'm totally not downplaying how wrong those things are.  Not at all.

In our house, we don't excuse sin or sweep it under the carpet in the name of "cute" or "a bad day" or an age-related phase.

It's really helped me a lot to realize that these things happen because they are daughters of Eve, as C.S. Lewis puts it.  We are descendants in a sinful line, descending from Adam and Eve and their sin in the garden.  It's just that nature coming out.

I was just wasting too much time wondering WHY?  

I'll admit sometimes there are other factors too.  They do need more sleep.  Things may have been too crazy busy lately or they may be feeling overly emotional.  There might even be hormonal changes!  I don't brush off those factors.

This is about teaching them how to be Godly, even when they don't feel like it.

My energies were going toward trying to figure out where the nasty little empress came from and what other factors were involved, instead of working on being diligent to promote kindness and patience.  See the difference?

Right now, I'm training my eyes on the wisdom that the Lord gives to those who ask.  That's what I need for every phase of parenting.