Monday, April 24, 2017

With a White-Knuckled Fist

If there's anything I'm learning about motherhood lately, it's that tired mamas rarely focus on the bright spots enough.  We can have a single load of laundry done, with clean clothes in the dressers for everyone to wear and we'll fret over the mounds of dirty clothes awaiting us.  

In my case, I might focus on every single flaw in my children... 
only occasionally bothering to dwell on the good things that are happening in their lives.  

The maddening thing about my children's flaws, is that they look remarkably like every character weakness I've ever exhibited in my 11.75 years of being a mama.  #wheredtheygetTHATfrom

If you ever want to feel bad about every failing you've got in your life, just have kids.  

There's nothing like seeing the four year old version, seven year old version, nine year old version and eleven year old version of your diamond-in-the-rough self, 
all on the same day... all day... every day.  

I hope you're hearing the humor here, but hearing the "real" too.  Nothing has helped me to remember how much I still need to grow in God and let Him change me every day, than motherhood has/does.  

I wish I could say I'm doing all kinds of wonderful at keeping my perspective balanced, but I haven't been lately.  All the "stuff" you deal with as a mama, seems so big.

Some of it is big.  These are people in the making, after all.

I'm dropping into bed at night with tears on my cheeks, feeling raw, overwhelmed and sometimes mystified.  I talk to the Rugged Mountain Man.  I pray.  I read the Word.  I write my thoughts, my struggles in my journal.  

And the glimmers of wisdom and grace always come through.

"Set your mind on things above, not on things of the earth."  
(Colossians 3:2, my paraphrase)

I've been letting my mind go in the mama gutter, the gutter that holds all of my failings, all of my weaknesses, every time that I didn't discipline with a right heart, every time I lost my temper, every time I took the easy road...

But, I'm been trying to set my mind on different things, better things.  I need to be mulling over the good things that the Lord is doing.  I can't forget the bright spots that He sends, those little encouraging things that He is working in this family.  

It's funny, the more I dwell on those good things, 
the more He breeds faith in me to believe Him 
for greater things in our lives.

Seize that one bright spot today, Mama.  

Grab it with a white-knuckled fist.  

Turn it over in your heart and let it help you believe God for more of the same.

I'll be here right beside you, clinging to the little bright spots too.


Visual bright spots from our recent Track & Field Clinic at the most gorgeous college track on the East Coast.