Perhaps this is a new series - Parenting Teens. It wasn't really planned, but I was making some observations the other day and thought I'd share them with you while they were on my mind.
As the Blossoms grow and get busier, I've found how necessary it is to keep everyone in the loop as far as the family schedule.
Every morning after their personal quiet time and then, our devotions together, we pow-wow about the day and days ahead. On Monday, we also especially pow-wow about the week ahead.
When changes inevitably must be made, it is SO important that I make sure all of the Blossoms are aware of these changes. When they understand expectations and plans, the whole day runs smoother. Attitudes are better. No one likes to be surprised... in that way. I mean, if you're talking surprise ice cream, that's a totally different story.
"Wait, I didn't know so-and-so was stopping over!"
"I didn't realize I had to have this done by then!"
"I didn't know we were leaving at this time!"
"I don't have this exam done; I can't go to that!"
With having four Blossoms, everyone is not always in the room when I make a comment or adjustment to our schedule for the day. And when 3/4 know of different expectations, that 1/4 can really throw a monkey wrench in the mix when they don't know they were supposed to be ready an hour earlier because we now have to run two more errands before Bible Quiz practice.
Blossom1 and Blossom2 have Google Calendars and we share important events with that program. It's very helpful! I'm still getting used to checking their calendars before I answer when someone asks if we're available. You'd think I'd remember if Blossom1 made a chiropractor appointment or that Blossom2 has a live lecture. BUT I DON'T. Use the tools that are out there to boost your brain power!
There's a degree of common courtesy underlying this whole approach. Understanding that I'm dealing with people. It's courteous to keep everyone in the loop. Herego, I do my best to inform everyone.
It's kinda funny but I've taken to making Public Service Announcements in our house. Sometimes I even use a silly announcer voice. Sometimes my PSA is me singing out "T-30 minutes til lift-off!" When you've got this many people leaving the house, it's just a good idea for everyone to know when time is tickin'.
It may sound ridiculous to make PSAs as there are only six of us, but let's be real, there are SIX of us! We need to be on the same page! I got tired of realizing I'd missed a Blossom or two in passing because someone was in the bathroom or something. I've realized that one way for me to parent well in this season is to be careful to inform EVERYONE.
Sometimes that means I ask the older Blossoms,
can you be available for this event?
Do you have room for this event in your week?
How will this affect your workload and productivity for school, if we say yes to this?
How can we make this work?
There's something respectful about that. Correspondingly, when I communicate that I want them to prioritize something, they usually extend that same courtesy and respect to the Rugged Mountain Man and me so we don't have to play hardball.
It's just a different approach from when I'd wake up in the morning and say, "We're going to the library today!"
Planning helps us develop and maintain unity in our family. Unity is my God-glorifying goal.
