Thursday, September 3, 2015

Maybe you've been noticed

I'm thankful for our little happy life.  We are indeed rich in blessings.  So many blessings!  Knowing that, I consider it an important thing to do my part to protect it.  I try to keep my personal self pretty and appealing, our home tidy and inviting and my husband's love tank full. 

A big part of my job is to keep the home fires burnin', any way I can.

Probably every married woman at some point has had her radar go off with the realization that somebody else's husband noticed her.  I've found myself in that situation at various points in my married life, through no fault of my own.  With a clear conscience before God, I can say that my heart and efforts have been whole-heartedly for my husband and no one else's. 
What is the appropriate reaction?
The worldly attitude is something like, "I'm attractive and a good wife.  So what?  It's his fault for looking."  That just doesn't seem godly. 

There's always a way out of temptation; maybe I can create that way out for someone else's husband.  They don't need their discontentment to grow.  I say to stay away.  Go see your friend (the wife), while her husband is at work, etc. 

Avoid one-on-one conversations with that man.  Picnics, bumping into him at the grocery store, etc... He needs to find his encouragement, his fulfilling conversations, his "iron sharpening iron" some place else.  It isn't gonna be from you.  Don't think you can help him get back on the right track.  Your simple friendliness could be misread now, so walk a delicate balance and keep it short, short, short.  If your husband is with you, stay close to him.  Once, in our pre-children married days, we were at a picnic.  I'd deemed myself too tired to play volleyball (astonishing, considering we were kidless then).  No sooner had I plopped myself on the sidelines, when a young lady started hitting on my husband.  Grrrr.  Of course, I was (very) irritated.  (Read: Ready to spit nails.)  I quickly joined the volleyball game (suddenly, no longer tired) and she laid off immediately.  Proximity can cause all sorts of weird situations to dissipate.  (It is interesting to note that my husband was completely unaware of that lady's attentions when we discussed the situation later.)

I think it's wise not to skirt around the issue in situations like this.  Tell your husband your suspicions.  It'll keep you honest and humble.  It'll keep your vanity from being flattered.  It'll keep a bad thing from growing in to a big, bad thing.  My husband's job is to protect me and care for me and our family.  If he knows what's out there, he can be on the lookout.  He can help.  Talking about stuff like this can strengthen your unity and trust. 

I've always thought that godliness sticks out like a pearl amongst limestone gravel.  I don't have to feel guilty because I'm doing my best to be a godly wife to my Rugged Mountain Man.  Being godly is attractive, it is.  We Godly wives still need to send the unapologetic signal that we're not for sale.  Not available.  Not in the market.  Not in the least. 

I've known women who *say* they're not in the market, but how they dress says they are totally available. 

(It is also worth mentioning that women who are dressing modestly are also attractive to other husbands.  Just because someone notices you, doesn't mean you were dressing immodestly.)

What a sensitive topic this is, but the blessing of Godliness is worth it, by far.

"What God has joined together,
let no man (or woman) pull asunder."

Got a Godly "thang" going?  Guard it ferociously.