Best Parenting Advice I've Heard Lately

I was recently sharing with a friend something I'd noticed in my own life.  As a mom, I feel tempted to think that if I could just be more creative about consequences, I would SEE more progress in my children.  OR, if I could just say something really profound or utilize a new strategy, I would NOTICE the changes in my children.  I realized though that this isn't true.  The parenting advice found in the Bible is straightforward and simple, so uber-creativity isn't a part of that and neither are super profound fancy strategies and slogans. 

I've also noticed that parenting is very much like "I can't see the forest, for all of the trees."  Because I am so much involved with the day to day (trudging) of parenthood and discipline, I only get brief glimpses of progress now and then.  Because we can't see (or feel) any progress, we think we've gotta change something; we need a better stategy or to be more creative.  We are somewhat deceived because what we really need instead is to just keep on, keepin' on. 

Keep on loving.

Keep on being consistent.

Keep on hammering away at that character issue.

Keep on patiently correcting.

Keep on being there. 

Keep on staying with the simple. 

Keep on, keepin' on.

I was at my in-laws house the other day and picked up a book by Phil Robertson, in which he describes his (very concise) parenting philosophy. 

- Rules are made to be broken, so make few rules.
- If they break the rules, give 'em three licks.

Honestly, while many of you are probably squirming, I appreciated his frank simplicity.  Truly, you might find that that lines up with Biblical principles more than most parenting books out there right now!  We spend so much time thinking, "Ok, she mouthed off.  What should I do now?  Maybe a talking-to.  Ok, this time, maybe a spanking.  Ok, now what?  Losing privileges...."  A few quick smacks on the hinder consistently can make all the difference in the world.  (For the record, that's what the Bible recommends.)  It's quick. It happens with surety and it is discipline that actually happens. 

I'd like to note that a lot of folks think that they have to smack the kid to high heaven to make it work. 

Spankings work because of their consistency,
not because of their intense physical pain. 

A few quick licks consistently can help more character progress to occur than the rare overly demonstrative spanking sessions can.

Maybe you need to just keep on, keepin' on or maybe you need to get back to Biblical basics with a"three licks" approach.  I know I've been challenged lately to do a little bit of both.

Spring Hike - Hurray!

Recently we took a gander on a new trail.  The snow is/has melted around here and the temps are rising.  Trails like this remind me how close most folks are to a nice little hike.  Seriously, we drove 5 minutes down the road, pulled off and got our "hike" on, which really means, unfold the jogging stroller, make sure everyone's coats are zipped up and hats are on.  Oh yes, and hang the camera around Mama's neck! 

The trail started out near a shale "cliff."  We "dinged" around here for a little while.  Blossom2, of course, had to collect rocks, ahem, I mean specimens.  She was smart enough to stow her bag of rocks so that she could snag it on the way down, rather than carry it the whole hike-long.  

 

  
 You all know that Blossom4 has an innate need to be up high.  Perhaps this is why she has bonded so well with Rory, our Bernese Mountain Dog.  The breed is originally from Switzerland and although we've only had Rory since February 15th, we've noticed how much he really loves to climb.  This is comically different from Jake, who adores water.  So, there we are with Jake, sloshing through the creek and Rory climbing the inclines on our left, higher and higher. 

 

 

I've never attempted a jogging stroller on a hike.  We always went the "pack" route, which when your little ones are two-ish or older, can get pretty heavy, pretty quickly.  It gives me more respect for all the times my dad carried my brothers on LONG hikes (including carrying my brother on his shoulders the entire way through Carlsbad Caverns.  My little brother even fell asleep and stayed asleep a good portion of the way!)  In any case, the stroller was a terrific solution and you can bet we'll be using that method of transporting Blossom4 again!  (Real men push zebra striped strollers!!)

 

The girls were delighted with all the ice formations they kept discovering. 

 

 

 

Daddy and I agreed that it was so good to be out and getting our blood moving in the brisk, fresh air.  (We both have been reading AWOL on the Appalachian Trail by David Miller, which has only strengthened our inspiration for hiking.) 

Something about being in nature immediately turns one's thoughts to the Lord.  I take a deep breath and gaze at the evergreens and the icy brook.  My Creator made this.  He ordered it.  He designed it.  It refreshes and blesses me.  And God called it good.  I'm inclined to agree.

Blossoms, Beauty and the Berner

The days are busy here, but so long as they are God-directed days I am happy with that.

I do love a little spontaneous Blossom playtime.  Those Disney Twinsie dolls just so happen to be Blossom4's favorite little activity.  After being blanket-trained to stay and play on the blanket during school time, she sometimes asks for a blanket to be spread out on the floor to play on.  Maybe boundaries are comforting... who knew?!

After assigning Blossom1 the job of prepping veggies for our supper, she surprised me with this.  That's what I'm talkin' about - girlies in the kitchen, complete with creativity!  I'm finding more and more that girls have a thirst for beauty.  My job is to help them know how to express that beauty and appreciate it in wholesome and Godly ways. 

 

Speaking of beauty, rustic mornings are astounding in their beauty, at times.  It reminds me of that quote, "A creation points to a Creator." 

 

And hey, I'm pleased to have finally snagged a decent shot of the "hundts" (affectionate Pennsylvania Dutch pronunciation for "hounds").  Jake and Rory are turning into pals!  I am glad that a Berner (Bernese Mountain Dog) and a Golden (Retriever) get along so well!  They've been adding a lot of "flavor" to life lately.

 

Well, there's a little photo glimpse into our past couple of days.  Keep the faith, my friends!

The WITH Principle

Thanks for joining me on a journey to evaluate our social media usage.  Does the Bible really have anything to say about this internet age and how it relates to me?  Read on to find out!

How are your social media habits affecting your family?  How much are you giving your family the glazed look?  Jesus spent countless hours WITH His disciples and this is how they learned from him.  That very principle, what I call the "WITH principle" ought to be applied to parenting.  Wouldn't you agree that social media out of control interferes greatly in our child-rearing and family relationships? 

I challenge you to read the Master Plan of Evangelism by Robert Coleman.  This book greatly impacted my parenting philosophy.  Being WITH your family will communicate Jesus to them.  But certainly not if you're giving them that glazed look when you glance in their direction. 

And, that's not even considering how you are training their internet habits.  What kind of gossip, busy-bodying, idleness and such are they learning from watching you on Facebook and the like?  You are training them in sin.

We must remember that the avoidance of temptation may involve drastic sacrifices.

When you're taking a look at your social media usage, ask yourself these questions.  It just might open your eyes.

- What does it make you think about?
- Are there too many words?
 - Are you reading gossip or gossiping?
- Is it slander?
- Is it unwholesome?
- Is it unfit for use God’s use?
- Is it foul, filthy or coarse?
- Does it grieve the Holy Spirit?
- Is it silly talk?
- Is it a word fitly spoken?
- Are you busy-bodying?
- Do you blab your good works?
- Are you wasting time or being idle?
- Is it first world drama?
 - Is it bad company?
- Is it the appropriate medium of communication?
- Is it promoting “WITH” for the best interests of my family?

What will you do now?

Person to Person

Thanks for joining me on a journey to evaluate our social media usage. Does the Bible really have anything to say about this internet age and how it relates to me? Read on to find out!

Have you ever noticed how people really shy away from person to person contact now?  As a Christian, that actually bothers me.  I know there are some situations where a text, a tweet or a personal message can get the job done just fine.  And I certainly won't throw the baby out with the bath water by trying to say that God is anti-media.  That'd be incorrect.  God used media to reach us.  The Bible has many books that are letters - a form of media! 

In general, I would say that person to person contact is usually best.  You'll notice "GO" in these verses, implying a personal conversation.

Matthew 18:15 says, “If your brother sins, GO and show him his fault in private; if he listens to you, you have won your brother.

Matthew 5:23-24 says, "Therefore if you are presenting your offering at the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your offering there before the altar and GO, first be reconciled to your brother, and then come and present your offering."

I will say this.  If you read, 1 Corinthians 5, Paul passed decisions and judgment via letters!

I conclude that there are some situations (long-distance situations, for example) where emails may be appropriate for communicating to people.  In general though, wouldn't you agree that even a phone call would be a better choice? 

What I'm trying to point out is that some folks are hiding behind their keyboards and computer screen.  They've become social media cowards, typing things that shouldn't be typed and sent. 

What will you do to change your social media habits?

Take a look at the rest of the series here:

- What does it make you think about?
- Are there too many words?
 - Are you reading gossip or gossiping?
- Is it slander?
- Is it unwholesome?
- Is it unfit for use God’s use?
- Is it foul, filthy or coarse?
- Does it grieve the Holy Spirit?
- Is it silly talk?
- Is it a word fitly spoken?
- Are you busy-bodying?
- Do you blab your good works?
- Are you wasting time or being idle?
- Is it first world drama?
 - Is it bad company?
- Is it the appropriate medium of communication?
- Is it promoting “WITH” for the best interests of my family?